Hi. I never thought that we’ll end up this way. I’ve predicted that was just temporary, but not this way. Nothing’s worse than being replaced, isn’t it? & thank you, thank you.

 Hi Ikan, Gue emang salah, I’ve fallen for you this hard. And it hurts, really. Apalagi jatuh, nggak ada yang nangkep. Yeah you WERE there. Not now. I’ve wished a million times to God for you to come back, but you disappeared like nothing really happened. Hehe sumpah berakhir tragis abis… It deeply hurts I swear to anything. I just want you to come back… I want my reality as good as my dreams, and that happens when I’m with you. When you make me feel like I’m the only one. When you make me feel like everything’s fine. When you make me feel like… Heaven on earth, when I’m with you.
Sekarang? :).

 Berarti those signs are fake ya? Mungkin universe cuman ngebuat gue berharap tapi gak dapet apa apa. Mungkin universe cuman mau ngerjain gue. Jail banget sih. :)

  “…Already broken, already gone, already know you’re moving on. I’m a breathing, talking.. Dead man, walking. Already see it, in your face, already someone, in my place. I’m a breathing, talking.. Dead man, walking..”

a song for you

[1st Verse]
I Don’t Need No Dreams When I’m By Your Side
Every Moment Takes Me To Paradise
Darlin’, Let Me Hold You
Warm You In My Arms And Melt Your Fears Away
Show You All The Magic That A Perfect Love Can
Make
I Need You Night And Day

[Chorus (1)]
So Baby, Be Mine (Baby You Gotta Be Mine)
And Girl I’ll Give You All I Got To Give
So Baby, Be My Girl (All The Time)
And We Can Share This Ecstasy
As Long As We Believe In Love

[2nd Verse]
I Won’t Give You Reason To Change Your Mind
(I Guess It’s Still You Thrill Me, Baby, Be Mine)
You Are All The Future That I Desire
Girl, I Need To Hold You
Share My Feelings In The Heat Of Love’s Embrace
Show You All The Passion Burning In My Heart
Today
It’s Never Gonna Fade

[Chorus (2)]
So Baby, Be Mine (Baby You Gotta Be Mine)
And Girl I’ll Give You All I Got To Give
So Baby, Be My Girl (All The Time)
You’re Everything This World Could Be
The Reason That I Live

[Bridge]
Won’t You Stay With Me Until The Mornin’ Sun
I Promise You Now That The Dawn Will Be Different
Lady Can’t You See That Heaven’s Just Begun
It’s Livin’ Here Inside Our Hearts

[3rd Verse]
There’ll Be No More Mountains For Us To Climb
(I Can’t Be Still You Thrill Me, Baby, Be Mine)
This Will Be A Love Lasting For All Time
Girl You Got To Hold Me
We Can Touch The Sky And Light The Darkest Day
Hold Me, Only You And I Can Make Sweet Love This Way
There’s No More I Can Say

[Chorus]
So Baby, Be Mine (Baby You Gotta Be Mine)
And Girl I’ll Give You All I Got To Give
So Baby, Be My Girl (All The Time)
You’re Everything This World Could Be
The Reason That I Live

[Chorus]
Baby Be My Girl
And Girl I’ll Give You All I Got To Give
So Baby, Be Mine, Baby, Be Mine
You’re Everything This World Could Be To Me

[Chorus]
C’mon, Girl, C’mon Girl
So Baby, Be Mine
You’re Everything This World Could Be To Me

Baby Be Mine by Michael Jackson :)

him

“If you love two people at the same time, choose the second one, because if you really loved the first one you wouldn’t have fallen for the second.” –  Johnny Depp.

“A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another, they will fall for each other… Maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or maybe forever.” – Dave Matthews Band

I think… I’m in love, maybe? 
Hi H, I never thought I’ll fall for you this hard. But well, I do. I’ve been thinking about you in the past week. I’ve thinking about us. And I don’t know, these feelings just come and haunt me every night. And every time I’m with you, I feel safe, I feel protected, I feel comfortable, I feel… Better than ever, I swear.

Not being too confident, tapi setiap dia nyapa gue tuh… Beda. Banget. Dia jarang banget nyapa cewek, palingan cuman senyum. Tapi kalo sama gue, he does. He always does that Michael Jackson thing in front of me. Yeah, he loves MJ. He chose me as his group member, he chose me FIRST than the others. My heart can’t stop screaming “iloveyouiloveyouiloveyou”. Nanya gimana rasanya? Gue kayak gak nginjek ke tanah. I’m happier than every person in the whole universe :)

At this point, I’m thinking to myself, am I in love? Did I just say that I love him? Since I don’t believe in happy endings neither happiness without sadness coming after it, this is the truth.
I am the bad guy. I love him, and I wish he loves me too. But someone loves him since the first day. I feel REALLY bad and I don’t know what to do. Gue udah ngejauhin dia kemarin, sebelum gue suka, tapi dia ngedeketin. Nyapa. Ngajak bercanda. I feel like we’re stuck in the moment… Gue bingung harus kayak gimana. Should I give up and back to my old love?

And I’ve handed over this problem to the universe (like in How I Met Your Mother :p). Since yesterday. Today, I saw 8.18. Tadi, bulu mata gue jatoh. And guess what? It’s letter H. Let’s see tomorrow.. & I’m praying for me, for us. :)

00.20

Hi peepol! Long time no see. I was busy with HEAPS of school stuffs and hell yeah, HOLIDAY! When my friends from other school are busy with their final exams and I'm here males malesan so yeah ;) ANYWAY I JUST GOT BACK FROM MALANG! It's late anyway but whatever. I went there for 5 days, from May 24th to 29th with my buddies (: such a great city to explore. I want to live there someday.

Okay, summer, okay. Everybody's preparing for their holiday to Singapore, Malaysia, even around Europe and Asia, Bali, or islands around Indonesia. And I'm sitting here like wow. My mom said WE WON'T GO ANYWHERE because of... Idk. "But mom.... We planned to explore Asia....." well, she won't listen to me anyway. But that's ok. That means I will explore J-ROCK AND VISUAL KEI THINGY YAAAAY.

Let me introduce you, my new addiction. Japan Rock. Now I listen to the GazettE, L'Arc~en~Ciel, Rentrer En Soi, and so many more. They're so addictive! <3.

That's enough. Danke! Xx

science&faith

You won't find faith or hope down a telescope

You won't find heart and soul in the stars

You can break everything down to chemicals

But you can't explain a love like ours.

yayy (:

20-05-12

You say that you love rain, but you open your umbrella when it rains.
You say that you love the sun, but you find a shadow spot when the sun shines.
You say that you love the wind, but you close your windows when wind blows.
This is why I am afraid, you say that you love me too.

24/04/12 (2)

Cross off the things you've done.

• Graduated high school
• Collected something really stupid.
• Smoked a cigarette.
• Got so drunk you passed out.
• Rode every ride at an amusement park.
• Gone to a rock concert.
• Helped someone.
• Gone fishing.
• Watched four movies in one night.
• Gone long periods of time without sleep.
• Lied to someone.
• Snorted cocaine.
• Failed a class.
• Smoked weed.
• Dealt drugs.
• Been in a car accident.
• Been in a tornado.
• Done hard drugs (i.e. ecstasy, heroin, crack, meth, acid).
• Watched someone die.
• Been to a funeral.
• Burned yourself. (slightly)
• Ran a marathon.
• Cried yourself to sleep.
• Been on a plane.
• Been cheated on.
• Written a 10 page letter.
• Gone skiing.
• Been sailing.
• Had a best friend.
• Lost someone you loved.
• Shoplifted something.
• Been to jail.
• Dangerously close to being in jail.
• Skipped school.
• Had detention
• Got in trouble for something you didn’t do.
• Stolen books from the library.
• Gone to a different country.
• Dropped out of school.
• Been in a mental hospital.
• Watched the “Harry Potter” movies.
• Had an online diary.
• Had a yard sale.
• Had a lemonade stand.
• Actually made money at the lemonade stand.
• Been in a school play.
• Been fired from a job.
• Taken a lie detector test.
• Swam with dolphins.
• Gone to Sea World.
• Voted for someone on a reality TV show.
• Written poetry.
• Read more than 20 books a year.
• Gone to Europe. 
• Loved someone you shouldn’t have.
• Used a colouring book over age 12.
• Had surgery.
• Had stitches.
• Taken a taxi.
• Seen the Washington Monument.
• Had more than 5 IM’s/online conversations going at once.
• Overdosed.
• Had a drug or alcohol problem.
• Been in a fist fight
• Suffered any form of abuse.
• Gone surfing in California.
• Had a hamster/guinea pig.
• Pet a wild animal.
• Used a credit card.
• Did “spirit day” at school.
• Dyed your hair.
• Got a tattoo.
• Had something pierced.
• Got straight A’s.
• Been on the Honor Roll.
• Known someone with HIV or AIDS.
• Made-out with someone.
• Played on a sports team.
• Snuck out of the house.
• Swore at a teacher.
• Gone laser tagging.
• Been on the TV.
• Skinny-dipped.
• Driven a car.
• Performed in front of an audience.
• Been in love.
• Had a blonde moment.
• Been on a train.
• Seen a ghost.
• Gone bungee-jumping.
• Been to Mexico.
• Crashed a car.
• Sky dived.
• Been kissed in the rain.
• Made an 11:11 wish.
• Drank alcohol. 
• Forwarded a chain letter.
• Made a mistake.